When you forget me

If I wake up one day, and you left me,
I will be fine
Even if you're there, even if you're not
even when the sun has set and you've moved on
I will be fine

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It started when I turned seventeen, the next day you weren't next to me.
we talked like we were best friends the day before but the next day you're gone.

It started when I was fifteen, I thought you will always be next to me,
through thick and thin, through rough and soft, through every dream we ever dream of,
then you move to another school

It started when I was twleve, we formed a group. we told ourselves that we'll never forget each other, but then I bet you've lost my number
even if you haven't, no conversation has started.

It started when I was ten, I started making friends, everyone was connected, there was no such thing as threats, maybe a fight for one day, the next we still stick to each other.

It started when I was five, A now I called "person" was one year older than me, told me that we will go to the same school. to me he was cool but I never met him afterwards.

Then, the cycle continues on and on. from the past, present and im sure, the future..
People who have labeled me as their "friends"...
Where are you now? can we meet sooner?

This is not a diss but more to express how I miss, the memories that we formed when we were kids, when the days were long.

be it yesterday, be it last week, be it last november or whatever year that we met.

Story number one, we met when I was year two. fast foward all the memories we had together, you're the definition of a real brother. The jokes we cracked, the places we went, the omegle we ventured, it all went passed to fast for me to swallow, that's why even If I dont show it in real life, Im always waiting for that next "tomorrow" if we can see each other again.
You may not know this, but Ive learnt a lot from you. About music and about games. from pokemon to harvest moon , from basshunter to owl city and all the random things we share and did.
sorry If i, was never there for you. Goodluck with university and life

Story number two, we met in year three, we were talking about yu yu hakusho and the law of ueki. You entered when we were year 2, didn't know what tingkap was but after a year, I would have never expected youd be close to me. fast foward again, pass though the field trips, futsal match and faris jokes, the current present we barely converse. But I guess it's fine, different school busy life. stay focus stay sharp. I know you can be on the top dont ever drop
keep running faster than ever. dont look back
sorry, if I ever hold you back. Goodluck with everything you do

Story number three,
we met when I was thirteen, looks like you had an australian slang, we pretty much done a carnucopia of things. fast foward more, you became a prominet friend in my life, sharing songs, videos, secrets  and opinions. Going everywhere anytime whenever. You were always there. but then youre always the type to become someone prominent to everyone, to aim higher heights and getting closer to your ambition, your goals. you had to move and leave me to live without you everyday next to my table, or even in the same class,
After you left, it wasn't the same.
it wasnt the same when you left

you might know or not know this, but you were the one who activate my addiction or fan-ish to animes. To me, it's a good thing because I dont regret any single one of it.
I know youve been through a lot
sorry, I wasnt brave enough to give you motivation when you needed
sorry, I wasnt there to tell you, you are more significant than youll ever know holistically



 story number four, story number five, same beginning. same ending different content simillar conclusions
it started with a Hi, it ended without a note. 
it started with a smile, then ended with another leaves the boat. but hopefully both still missing
whoever is watching this im sure youve experienced something simillar before.
Do you like it? because I dont.

Story number unknown,
after years passed of me changing close friends, another one has appeared, 
Dont expect too much because one day  Ill be in tears.
in one year,
God so many things happened. Through all the hardwork we spent together, through your laughter, your smile and days when you were full with tears.
Through the times we walk side by side together , those were the moments that I hold dear
when you used to talk to me like I was the only one, and I ignore the others.
when  you used to walk with me to god knows where were we going
through all the times we argued but no hard feelings after,
I always thought that,
the days we always talk.. will never change.
but it couldn't be help right?
it's the last exam year and im sure you're busy so I hope I wont be a bother,
you have to stay focus because you're going to the future soon.

sorry if I, ever make you feel uncomfortable, dissapointed or was a burden,

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sometimes I ask myself "what did I do wrong?"
was I not friendly enough? was I mean? was I rough? was I bad? 
Did I hurt them, scar them, did I make them sad?

but it doesnt matter, because as long as their hearts keep beating im sure they will all grow stronger.
As I gradually grow weaker, my vague heart started to trigger my tears from my eyes
Every night when I think of All of you, a silent .. and soft laughter runs at the back of my head.
a vision of our past memories flashes in my mind.
somehow, that was my most precious treasure and blessing.
because I realized
when I wake up one day, and you left me,
I will be fine
Even if you're there, even if you're not
even when the sun has set and you've moved on
I will be fine
even if you're there, even if you're not.
I'll carry on.
I will send my smile, my voice.
even if it reaches to someone, or to a void.
at least at the end of the day

my memories of you all
will never be erased.



What inspired me to write this : Ichiban no takaramono from angel beats
Song For Friends from Little Busters